Because the Floor is Easier

Sad, empty hamper -
Dreaming of socks and tee shirts.
Such wishful thinking...

Lame Excuse

I do feel sick, Mom.
Honest. I’m not kidding you.
Math test? Today? Huh?

Get Out of My Space

He touched my sandwich!
What a jerk. Gross.Yuck. Bleccch. Eeuuew.
I can’t eat it now.

Daily Hygiene Mantra

Did you wash your hands?
Did you clean and floss your teeth?
Did you brush your hair?

Urgent Letter to American Pediatric Academy

Sleep on side? On back?
Better to sleep on stomach?
Make up your minds, please.

Ripped Knees Believe it or Not

I need roller blades!
PLEEEAAASE! I will wear the knee pads.
I WON’T get injured!

Must Vacuum Car

Dead roach in my car.
Must have died happy, sated.
Chip crumbs. Cookie crumbs.

Nyeh -Nyeh

Her son got straight “A”s.
Isn’t that just wonderful?
Too bad she’s ugly.

Friday Night When You’re Nine

Sponge Bob’s on at eight!
Cupboard is full of junk food!
Ain’t life wonderful?

Another Gullible Parental Moment

No homework again?
Gee. That’s just like all last week.
Hey, just go have fun!

Siblings

But HE hit me first.
That’s not true. SHE hit ME first.
Poop breath! Stupid head!

Pet Lies We Believe

PLEASE buy that cool dog!
I will give him food and drink.
Yes, and walk him, too…

Kiddy Birthday Party

Piñata in tree,
Kid shoving cupcake in mouth.
Which is more “high strung”?

No one Said Life was Fair, Honey

Jim’s bedtime is 10.
Matt’s allowance is bigger.
Jake has his own room.

Email Faith at Faith@FaithFoyil.com

Check back to www.faithfoyil.com   in a few weeks for more details on how you can order signed copies of  Faith's first book, Sunny Daze: The Humorous Misadventures of a Tropical Island Mom to be published by Llumina Press in spring 2005.